Practicality vs. following one’s dreams and instinct.At this point… which is what? It can all be swapped interchangeably. Life isn’t as black and white as it used to be. I forgot how to live in grays. Practicality vs. my own feelings. This has been an on-going theme in my life.

I decided to bring my bible back out to take some time to reflect on my own life… at 3 in the morning, despite being rather tired. oh well.

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“People die from their passions. And people die because they don’t live their passions.”

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1) How are the body and self interconnected?
2) What happens through chaos and disruption?
3) How does the self survive? Does it? Can you ever be prepared for change?

There is great freedom in letting go. There is great freedom in liminality.

To believe there is a TRUTH is a social construction.

A sense of loss affects one’s sense of self and homeostatus.

The less you can cling, the less you have to lose, the more free you are.

Living in liminality — living betwixed and between.

NATURAL processes of liminality can still be stigmatizing to the sense of self.

We’re always trying to find a sense of coherence for survival of life when our lives are changed dramatically. NOTHING is stable except for change. A stable life is an illusion. We cling to it at our own peril.

It’s okay not to be okay, but NOT in society.

It’s hard to let go of dreams. But at some point, we must reconcile the self: letting go, completely separating your self from everything that gave meaning to your self. We have ALL these ideas of what life should be like. But NO one ever tells you to be prepared to abandon ship.

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Survival Strategies:

• Set definite targets: give yourself purpose and accomplishments that are attainable
• Make more decisions: Sitting there vs. going deeper into that which you fear. Get in, get out, and move on. Don’t just sit there and die.
• CUT THE ROPE: let GO of anything holding you back. Sometimes, the rope will be cut for you.

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A sense of PLACE:

- Bobos: “There’s got to be so much more than this moment,” there MUST be something more, contemplating giving it all up.

- Conflict of wanting a sense of commitment and a sense of freedom

- Difficult to find comfort and belonging in our own skin, when basic things are contradicting each other.

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Is what you’re doing fulfilling a need for yourself? or to fill emptiness?

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The body is the one thing you think you can control, but it’s not. You can try to maintain a certain self, but your body often conflicts with you. Where are you in relationship to your body to pleasure and pain?

There is a great importance in people. When we’re sick, when we’re broken, all we want to be is touched. What would happen if you let others in? Why would we cut the rope to go into a place that scares us? The things we fear the most are the paths out, which threatens us.

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It’s important to know when to let go. Take care of yourself. You can’t help others unless you help yourself first. Society tells us to not be selfish. But who are we serving? We can’t serve others if not ourselves.

Keep moving, find places to slow down.

Be gracious, accepting, and resilient.

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We’re always searching for a life we’re not living. If you can’t be at home with where you are, you’ll always be reaching for something else, always searching for the next best thing. You’ll always be busy, and not sitting with your own emotions.

We’re always searching for the next best thing. We’re always trying to HAVE IT ALL. And what if we could have it all? What if we really COULD have everything we wanted? Would we even recognize that we have it all? Or would we simply run to find the next best thing? Would you even KNOW that you even had it all? Would you want it all? Would you feel bad?

Take a deep breath.

Shut your eyes.

Feel the breathing of your stomach inhale and exhale deeply.

And tell yourself:

This is enough.

I don’t have to be anywhere else but here.

I already have it all.